[spam][crazy][fiction][random] Non-Canon MCBoss Spinoffs

[Undescribed Horrific Abuse, One Victim & Survivor of Many]

Boss stares at a swimming vegan fish.

The vegan fish is vegan because it swims up to people like Boss and
says "eat me!" but Boss doesn't eat it. This particular vegan fish
does a special dance to influence Boss's decisions, by timing its
muscle motions to stimulate surprise-processing neurons in Boss's
brain that desynchronize his plans, thoughts, or actions around it. It
adjusts the timing to do the desynchronizing better.

Vegan fish!