I Need To Know What Happened To My Mind

[Karl Semich]

Dr. Mooney,

I remember when I described to you my difficulty finding things on my
phone, or manipulating it with one hand, that you expressed not to worry
about this, that you had these problems too.  I also remember during our
therapy, you were always very very respectful. Of course, you are much
older than I am, and you had significant skill with psychology and people,
whereas I had significant skill with digital engineering and phones.

I wanted to say that if anything bad were to happen or had happened to my
mind, I would really, really need to know what it was, enough to study
protecting and healing myself. It wouldn’t matter why it happened, or where
it came from, or if it was an accident or anything else. It matters what it
is that happened to me, with as much precision and detail possible, and how
to protect and heal from it.

I spent my life nurturing my mind. During grade school, I refused to learn
to take notes or make lists, so that I would learn to remember everything.
I practiced willpower in everything I did. I questioned everything anyone
said, and tried to figure out every single answer, written or spoken,
before learning what it was. I looked always for foods and mental exercises
that would help my mind. My mind and brain were my highest priority in the
things I did.[1]

The mind is how we make our decisions, execute our skills, and direct our
lives. With our minds, we can find ways to heal our bodies, but the reverse
is not as true.

I need to know what happened to my mind and brain.

Thank you.

Karl Semich

1: I did this my entire previous life, and my family knew it about me. Once
when I was a child, my father convinced me to take medicine rather than
using my will to handle an illness, by explaining how it would protect my
brain. They found ways for me to audit and take courses in school I didn’t
have the prerequisites for, which I did and enjoyed as puzzles that would
strengthen my mind. I took AP physics as a sophomore in high school, and
vector calculus and robotics as a freshman in college. I generally worked
hard at these courses, without access to the prerequisites, and passed them.

Similarly, I’ve always been comfortable reading research papers. I would
have been able to study and learn the things needed to protect myself, if I
only knew that I needed to, and what it is to study.
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